Socks. Talking about dirty ones. Filled with your own sweat, and the dried remains of whatever bug had decided your shoe was a good place to spend the night. You sniff, curious about how they smell.

And before you know it, you're eating them. And you know its a bad idea. You know you're going to make yourself sick and regret it later. But you keep chewing. Maybe its the saltiness. Or maybe its that gritty texture, or the way the elastic gets stuck between your teeth. Some of your friends and family, though they don't see you eating the socks, start to notice something strange about your breath.

But it's not a problem, right? You see lots of other people doing it. Some of them even compliment you on your fine taste in dirty socks, patting you on the back and giving you an "attaboy!" A few even seem vaguely interested in tasting your socks, curious about what your sweat tastes like. You're among equals, after all. Good people who have developed a unique taste for something out of the ordinary, right?

What I mean to say is, there's a time when you realize that there's better things to eat in the world than your dirty socks. Sure, they're not yours, and you won't have people curious over how your sweat tastes or complimenting you for your diet. But you know, sometimes a nice, simple piece of bread is sufficient.

And sure, at times you may get a hankering for some salty, gritty, bug-encrusted cotton/elastic blend, but you know that once you start chewing you'll be stuck on it again for a while. You don't want that, do you?

Time to eat bread. Maybe I'll toast it so it reminds me of the socks.