Nevertheless! I would first like to thank Gregorio. Without his creation of such a title, winning it would never have been possible. I would like to extend my greatest respect for my fellow posters, especially the ones who were also nominated. You all add your own bit of musk stink to the boards, and for that I am grateful. I hope that you will all join me on my cabinet.

Relatively speaking, not many people post on this board. I think that there are an assload of voyeurs out there (you know who you are, yes...I'm talking to you. No not that other one. YOU.) so with the small number of posters, we gotta keep things fresh. Arguments about politics, religion, parking, spicy chicken sandwiches, who is the biggest turd burglar and of course who can make the most longest post which nobody will enjoy reading.

As poster of the month, I would like to discuss what will transpire during my reign. During my campaign, I made absolutely no promises about what I will do if I win. Therefore, I have no obligation to do squat on here except keep on being me. 

What is me, you may ask? Well, I believe that laughter lowers cortisol levels. I love cheesesteaks. My favorite colour is blue. My choice of running shoes is nike. I once saw Tommy Lee's bare ass. I smell like gardenias and fresh laundry. Bed Affleck's face makes me really friggin' angry. 

Well anyways, it is saturday night peeps. I gotta get going because I gotta a really totally awesome hot date planned. Yea, me and a glass of wine. Mmmmhmmmm...! So thank you to those who voted for me. For those that didn't, well you had your reasons and I respect that. 

Nahhhh, not really. Screw you! hahahahahhahahahaah!!!!!!!

Nahhhh, not really. Goodnight, my fellow Amuricans. May God and Vishnu bless you.