Good morning, I must admit everyone of your posts are all lovable yet each individually unique, and show the way they are choice and typically raise my spirits here at Flat Tuesdays. Now I'm a first time poster here and while I tend to enjoy all of your posts, there's an issue at hand-  I'm not sure how many of you UMBCers have been able to notice this in the Fine Arts Building these past two days, (Did I mention I have been drinking coffee for the past 9 hours locked in Flat Tuesdays?) Anyway back to the story, I'm sure many of you use the elevators in Fine Arts right? Well I hate to be the gossiper or the first to say this but there's been a relatively boisterous amount of clairvoyant holiday ghoul templars banging and slamming the fine arts elevator doors shut, contributing to a very noisy, destructive finals week including but not limited to your typical run-of-the-mill transistor frack meltdowns. What upsets my idols the most, when they are really disappointed in me, when I swear to them I can't prove the existence clairvoyant ghoul templars, they grant some realization of blasted sense into the area above where my tonsils once shared! They scream into my one ear and inform me how these illusions of semiconductor meltdowns are mere hogwash, that i can't logically be afraid of frackaclysms on account of some easily avoidable ghoul templars! “Ha!” The Idol said, “And holiday ghoul templars use it when you need it! Won't that be your jolly Christmas? Ha!”  But graciously, as our celebration came to a segway, the late great passing and unfortunately essential yet heedless self-amputation of Geology/Dance double minor Jennifer Buxley's own foot, as well as her storied, purposeful giant party sub donated by Albin O Kuhn himself was memorialized today in a 4 hour special on ESPN2 and later made into a hit Broadway musical turned steampunk band featuring Don Rickles and Noam Chomsky.

RIP Jennifer Buxley