Perhaps you’ve had this experience.  I walked into my discussion classroom the other day, and I was given a chair (oh, great!) which I was then told not to sit in (…?).  I was further informed that if I did, in fact, sit in the chair, that it would then be taken away.  Four chairs there were at the table, one for each expected party.  1, 2, 3, 4.  Hmmm...

          So, was this psychology class then, I hear you wondering?  No indeed, this was in fact Chemistry 101, where it was then further explained to us all that they (the instructors and, we are told, the dean) “…just like to see you standing there…” presumably ready to write at the whiteboard (although that isn’t really how she said it).  But, since the primary repository for our collective work was actually on our table’s computer, and since the monitor was visible from each of the seats there, no one really paid any attention  to the loudly clattering, poorly maintained whiteboard that I was scribbling on at all manner of awkward angles, least of all me.  In any case, as I stood there I began to wonder, why was this extra chair even present at our table?  If I had asked, I was sure I’d get some patronizing rephrasing of the earlier explanation, about how they wanted to show us trust and respect us as adults by doing so. 

          The funny thing is, it would be the first time at least since I turned eighteen that anyone has threatened to ‘take my chair away’ and it really doesn’t make me feel very grown up at all.  It makes me feel a bit silly in fact, somewhat juvenile, and more than a little bit insulted.  I rather got the feeling that the chair may even have been intended, on some level, whether consciously or not, to be what it had actually become over the following two hours: a looming reminder of any instructors unquestionable authority to micromanage even the most insignificant aspects of our groups interactions.  Basically, it felt like a power trip.

          The whole long schpeel (in slow, measured tones) about it during the introduction certainly gave it the very strong feeling of a biscuit being balanced on my nose, some kind of inane test to prove my obedience, complete with a long list of demerit-style point deductions available for those who colored outside the lines.  Add to this the hawk-like circulation of the (let’s be honest) grad-students teaching the class, and you have what is essentially a very uncomfortable elementary school classroom. 

Okay, so I’m going to go ahead and be honest with you; I just turned thirty this year, and I kind of don’t like being condescended to.  But the more important point here is that I don’t like hearing any of you, my colleagues, being condescended to either, no matter how old or young you may be.  I’ve seen it and said nothing  far too often.  This is, unfortunately, another case of the all too common lecture point here: “Okay everyone, now that you’re in college, people are going to expect you to be responsible for yourselves and to behave like adults.  To be sure that this happens, we are now going to treat you all like four year olds.”  Then the students all behave like four year olds, and everyone is disappointed. 

Or… are they?  I wonder if perhaps many of the highly driven and self-assured individuals who run our academia don’t feel, perhaps, just a little bit self-satisfied when their haughtily minimal expectations for us are met, and if it might even be part of the reason that those smugly low expectations seem to creep steadily into the form and manner of our classrooms. 

 I don’t know, it’s just a thought I’ve been having.

 Furthermore I have two other small but important points.  First, this discussion period is supposed to simulate a work-space-like environment for us students, to help us be ready for careers in research, engineering, and many other fields.  That seems cool, right?  I agree that you should be forced to work with people that you don’t know, to divide labor without letting the project becoming scattered, and to work with others against a common deadline.  I am quite certain, however, that no one at Lockheed-Martin or GlaxoSmithKlein would ever tell you that you cannot sit today, or else they will take away your chair and deduct a dollar from your paycheck.  *waggling an admonishing finger*  If you had to be upright all day, I’m sure they could find you a stool.

They might say, “Don’t dump a bottle of Axe over your head before coming to work anymore, or we will fire you” which will of course never be said at this or any other college.  More is the pity.  I’m just saying:  Priorities, people.

“Respect is a thing that is first given, and then asked for in return.  It can never be demanded, nor offered as a prize, for what is exchanged then is not respect at all, but is always something inferior.”      -???

Veritas,

Robert Thorn