(since I'm convinced that we need some way to recover from the addiction that is myUMBCchan, I'm gonna start off.)

I've been trying to better myself, tell myself that I can quit when I want to and that this time will be the last time.  Everytime I try to get clean though I keep coming back.  I was able to stay clean for roughly a week though, which is an accomplishment.

I remember my first hit of myUMBCchan two or three years ago.  I was first introduced to this pixel snorting by someone who I will not name.  They told me about all the interesting people here, that the wildest stuff went on and that the entertainment was bar none.  Doing a line would be like no other experience I have ever had before.

They were right, I was hooked ever since then.  At first it seemed like just a regular old high but then I got involved in some really crazy stuff.  It got really weird, like with people claiming to be prophets and dinosaurs living with humans and stuff.  I'd see the most messed up shit on the screens, to say that some of it wasn't safe for work would be an understatement. 

Pretty soon the entertainment stopped being fun.  People would go into all out wars over things like chicken sandwiches.  We'd tear each other apart the minute any Supreme Court ruling came out, regardless of how we felt about it.  We needed reasons to knock each other's teeth out.  We had become so consumed in our orgy of arguments and insanity that we had become desensitized to it.  Only no holds bar fighting could excite us anymore.  Only by ripping each other's flesh off can we feel any kind of sensation anymore.

People were really getting paranoid and shit.  There was talk of Satanic cultists, communists, heathen lords, borg, and that one word that will always resonate in my mind and haunt me forever...

KILLUMINATI!!!

New people come in and expect that maybe things will be different.  "Maybe we can do myUMBC in moderation," they might say, or "it doesn't have to be this way."  Yet somehow, all of us who try to change how we do things only become a part of it.  I see it time and time again.

That's when I knew I had to get out, to admit that I had a problem, and it had gotten to the point where I could not get out of this it on my own.  My life has been consumed by this to the point where at times I care more about my life with myUMBCchan than my actual life.

So that's been my experience.  Let's go around the room and share our own.  Maybe we can help each other.