A resource round-up provided by Women’s Center staff members Meagé and MJ

In case you missed Tuesday’s roundtable on (In)Visible Disabilities and Women (or if you were there and want to keep the conversation going), we thought it might be useful to summarize some of the discussion in addition to linking some useful reading materials and resources.

As with all of our roundtables, we reached out to our panel members and asked them to keep a few guiding questions in mind as they shared their stories and examples. Some of these included:

• Where do the intersections of (in)visible disabilities and gender show up for you personally? In the classroom, peer networks, etc.?

• How does disability relate to issues like reproductive justice, sexual violence, or gender socialization?

• How is the way we talk about disability influenced by gender and sexuality?

• How does ableism impact women with visible vs. invisible disabilities differently?

• Why is this a social justice and/or feminist issue?

On Tuesday, our panelists shared their definitions and experiences of disabilities and their intersection with gender. Rina Rhyne of Voices Against Violence, elaborated on the array of sexual assault/violence perpetrated towards people with disabilities. “Sexual violence is not always physical. Caretakers and partners can manipulate the power and control they hold in relationship.” (See the Power and Control Wheel: People with Disabilities and their Caregivers)  Dr. Julie Murphy spoke to the ways in with ADHD are diagnosed (or not) and the ways in which gender socialization impact the ways in which people respond or react to with women with ADHD. Dr. Kate Drabinski reflected on teaching disability studies and encouraged us to learn more about the social model of disability. Student Leader, Prachi, shared her experience as a Deaf student here at UMBC. She explained the duality of deafness, “it is both an invisible and visible disability.” Prachi also spoke to what it means to be Deaf as a woman of color and called for a change in the way we view disabilities saying, “deafness is not ugly nor is it negative.”

With only an hour to spend together, there’s still so much more we could have discussed and learned together. Below are just a few resources to help us continue to engage in self-reflection and growth.

Thanks to our panel members for the important and rich conversation!

From Stuff Mom Never Told You

• When America’s “Ugly Laws” Hid the Disabled Poor From the Public Eye
• Disabled Sexuality Podcast

From Everyday Feminism

• How Mainstream Feminism Continues to Perpetuate Ableism (And How We Can Change That)
• I’m Not a Person with a Disability. I’m an Disabled Person
• 4 Ways to Be an Ally to People with Invisible Disabilities

News and other articles

• #SolidarityIsForTheAbleBodied, and Feminism’s Ableism Problem
• The hidden victims of campus sexual assault: Students with disabilities
• The Place of Women with Disabilities in Feminist Movements

Helpful Legal Services/ Information on Disability Rights and Accommodations

• Maryland Disability Law Center
• U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission
• Pro Bono Resource Center – Maryland
• Maryland Volunteer Lawyers Service
• JAN Network – Job Accommodation Network
• ADA – Americans with Disabilities Act
• Rape,Abuse & Incest National Network: Sexual Abuse of People with Disabilities
• Power & Control Wheel:People with Disabilities and their Caretakers

On-campus Resources

• Student Disability Services
• AOK Library Assistive Technology
• UMBC Counseling Center
• Voices Against Violence

Read more from other roundtable roundups:

Trans Identities + Mental Health (March 2016)

Black Trauma + Mental Health (February 2016)

White Womanhood + Critical Whiteness (September 2015)

This is a blog post written by student staff member, Carrie Cleveland.

This post is reflective of my own journey in trying to embrace who I am while trying to work on improving my overall health.  I chose to write about what I am doing because it is an important part of who I am right now. Everyone has their own path, this just happens to be mine.

So I joined a gym. Not just a regular gym with a bunch of treadmills and elliptical machines. I joined  Conquest Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and MMA gym. I mean, what middle aged, overweight woman decides that this is the way that she’s going to lose weight?  At least, I didn’t think it would be my personal path. But, it went something like this…

I saw a post on Facebook for a weight loss challenge that said that for $100 I’d receive 10 weeks of classes and nutritional coaching. There are classes specifically for women called Fight Fit. They are like Crossfit mixed with some punches and kicking. I also get access to their yoga classes.  I love me some yoga!  I thought “what the hell?!” and I signed up.

It took my ENTIRE being to not make that same face as the woman in green!

The first day that I walked in to the gym, I was measured and my weight was taken. I knew the woman who was doing this for me, and when I stepped up on the scale, I cried. I was so upset with myself that my weight was as high as it was. I immediately felt a sense of shame, but I did not want to let that shame stop me from taking the next step on this journey.

Photographic evidence of my first Fight Fit class

After the traumatic weigh in, I walked in and started my class. Everyone looked super fit and healthy and in shape. I mean, professional MMA fighters train at this gym. Come on! I definitely thought my fat ass did not belong there (this warrants an entire post on its own but this blog sort of sums it up) but I got through that first workout with some modifications. I was surprised though that all these people that I just met were amazingly supportive. I think I had a preconceived idea that everyone would be super judgy and think I did not belong. The instructors all were willing to meet me where I am at and help me modify some things so I could get through the workouts.  I was not expecting the huge levels of support I would receive from all of them and truly, it is priceless.

The next day I woke up and could barely move. My entire body hurt. Every muscle was sore. By the end of that day I basically crawled into bed and just curled up in a ball because I felt like I could no longer function. Then Monday came and I did something I thought I would not do.

I went back.

I took another class, and I was so surprised because it was hard and the workout SUCKED, but I did it. I got through it and I was so proud of myself. The other women in the class were cheering me on and encouraging me. I mean who does not want that?!?!

Repeat like 1000 times

For the past five weeks I have gone to classes almost regularly. I have made modifications to my diet like eliminating sugar and alcohol, and it is making a difference. I have noticed small changes in myself and I am shocked. My pants are looser. I am less sore after a workout. My wedding rings fit again after what feels like forever. Today, one of my friends stopped me and told me I looked good.  It was such a great affirmation of my hard work and even though I know my value is not determined in how I look or how much I weigh, I do appreciate someone noticing that I am working on me.

I have five weeks to go and I think I have a real chance of winning the challenge. After these first few weeks though I realize it is not about the potential prize at the end, it is about me. Many women, myself included, spend so much time taking care of other people that we put ourselves last on our own list. I am so guilty of this and I need to do better. I need to make myself a priority and that is what I am doing right now. I stepped out of my little box of fear and I tried something new. When I did that I found a gym that met me where I am at and embraced the person I am.  The trainers, yoga instructor, and the other students have been nothing but encouraging and helpful.

Daniel recently wrote this blog about how important it is that we treat ourselves with love. His words ring so true to my own journey in valuing myself and my body.  Although our paths are different, I believe our destinations are similar.  We just want to feel good about the body we are in. This is very reflective of what the body positivity movement is trying to teach all people. I am a work in progress but I feel good for the first time in a long time about who I am TODAY and who I can be TOMORROW.