myUMBC Fanfic: The Numerous Tomfooleries of Erik Walker
Chapter Two: The One Where Colin Does Stuff
posted about 12 years ago
Fresh off the presses for your Friday morning!
The Numerous Tomfooleries of Erik Walker and His Confederation of Bandits
Chapter Two: The One Where Colin Does Stuff
The motorcycle accelerated down the road with the four hanging on as tightly as they could. "Look out Universe! I'm gonna rip you a new time-hole!" Colin yelled into the crackling air as the motorcycle shot out a portal into the wild unknowns of time and space. The bike kept accelerating faster and faster into an unholy oblivion of light and darkness intertwined into a cosmic tunnel. The path thinned and thinned into a very sexy singularity. It was churning out bit after bit of time chunks. As they were almost about to be compacted into anti-matter dust; Colin's voice pierced into what could literally be interpreted as the heavens. "Not now! Not ever! God's wrath, I commandeth thee, BEGONE!" Colin raised his index finger and with enough force to shatter a man's knee, brought it crashing down to a button on the bike's control panel. Anti-matter shielding coated the vehicle and its occupants as they went screaming into the singularity's epicenter. They erupted out of the other side, a multicolored void with platforms of hard light guiding them to their next destination. Christina was the first to speak. "That was literally the most badass thing that I've ever seen. Ever." "That was only phase one, youngling" Colin said with enough weight to bring an aircraft carrier into the briny deep. "What are those?" Erik yelled. Approaching from behind were a gang of scaly mutants on their own pack of hover bikes. Colin checked his mirror. "Shit! Gravity Goblins! " "What do we do?" Christina asked fearfully. The Gravity Goblins began firing upon our heroes with inertia rays. After 45 seconds of not saying anything, Greg cracked out this gem: "I am John ‘Motherfucking’ Galt!" He lit ablaze and began pulverizing the approaching threat with giant hammers of flame and hate. As his comrades were hit by the incendiary arcs, the leader of the Goblins called in reinforcements. Not only did more teleport in via space-time cracks, but get this; energy dragons began to appear and cut our heroes off. Colin was not to go out this way. "Activate infinity turrets!" On each side car, turrets materialized in a blast of light. Colin barked out his orders. "Greg! Switch places with Erik! Erik, Christina; take the helms of each turret. I'm going all in! AUTOPILOT ENGAGE!" They followed orders and kept the dragons at bay with infinity charges. Colin then jumped out of the bike and sliced the Goblin's leader in half with his green energy blade. "Banzai, motherfucker!" The two halves of the Goblin leader flopped off his hover bike and dissipated into vector grids. "Um, Colin?" Christina yelled back to her compatriot "Shit's getting real!" As she said this, the energy dragons formed into a mighty hydra approaching their vessel. Colin charged forward on the hover bike, carefully avoiding Greg’s blazing mallets of destruction as they were still making short work of the dwindling Gravity Goblins. He passed in front of his crew and jumped out of the hover bike. "I won't give you the satisfaction!" His blade grew twice its size and started to spark at a whitish-blue hue. He made his descent with his weapon pointing downward. It tore into the energy hydra's glowing visage until its core exploded with enough power to send him twenty feet upward. "HOMING" The time bike homed in on his location and flew up to catch him. By the time this was said and done, the infinity turrets and fire hammers had destroyed the Gravity Goblins for good. The four then arrived at their destination inexplicably. San Fernando was but a smoldering crater. They were going to find out about the monster that did this. Btw, it was a demon. TUNE IN NEXT TIME. SAME myUMBC TIME, SAME myUMBC CHANNEL.
Chapter Two: The One Where Colin Does Stuff
The motorcycle accelerated down the road with the four hanging on as tightly as they could. "Look out Universe! I'm gonna rip you a new time-hole!" Colin yelled into the crackling air as the motorcycle shot out a portal into the wild unknowns of time and space. The bike kept accelerating faster and faster into an unholy oblivion of light and darkness intertwined into a cosmic tunnel. The path thinned and thinned into a very sexy singularity. It was churning out bit after bit of time chunks. As they were almost about to be compacted into anti-matter dust; Colin's voice pierced into what could literally be interpreted as the heavens. "Not now! Not ever! God's wrath, I commandeth thee, BEGONE!" Colin raised his index finger and with enough force to shatter a man's knee, brought it crashing down to a button on the bike's control panel. Anti-matter shielding coated the vehicle and its occupants as they went screaming into the singularity's epicenter. They erupted out of the other side, a multicolored void with platforms of hard light guiding them to their next destination. Christina was the first to speak. "That was literally the most badass thing that I've ever seen. Ever." "That was only phase one, youngling" Colin said with enough weight to bring an aircraft carrier into the briny deep. "What are those?" Erik yelled. Approaching from behind were a gang of scaly mutants on their own pack of hover bikes. Colin checked his mirror. "Shit! Gravity Goblins! " "What do we do?" Christina asked fearfully. The Gravity Goblins began firing upon our heroes with inertia rays. After 45 seconds of not saying anything, Greg cracked out this gem: "I am John ‘Motherfucking’ Galt!" He lit ablaze and began pulverizing the approaching threat with giant hammers of flame and hate. As his comrades were hit by the incendiary arcs, the leader of the Goblins called in reinforcements. Not only did more teleport in via space-time cracks, but get this; energy dragons began to appear and cut our heroes off. Colin was not to go out this way. "Activate infinity turrets!" On each side car, turrets materialized in a blast of light. Colin barked out his orders. "Greg! Switch places with Erik! Erik, Christina; take the helms of each turret. I'm going all in! AUTOPILOT ENGAGE!" They followed orders and kept the dragons at bay with infinity charges. Colin then jumped out of the bike and sliced the Goblin's leader in half with his green energy blade. "Banzai, motherfucker!" The two halves of the Goblin leader flopped off his hover bike and dissipated into vector grids. "Um, Colin?" Christina yelled back to her compatriot "Shit's getting real!" As she said this, the energy dragons formed into a mighty hydra approaching their vessel. Colin charged forward on the hover bike, carefully avoiding Greg’s blazing mallets of destruction as they were still making short work of the dwindling Gravity Goblins. He passed in front of his crew and jumped out of the hover bike. "I won't give you the satisfaction!" His blade grew twice its size and started to spark at a whitish-blue hue. He made his descent with his weapon pointing downward. It tore into the energy hydra's glowing visage until its core exploded with enough power to send him twenty feet upward. "HOMING" The time bike homed in on his location and flew up to catch him. By the time this was said and done, the infinity turrets and fire hammers had destroyed the Gravity Goblins for good. The four then arrived at their destination inexplicably. San Fernando was but a smoldering crater. They were going to find out about the monster that did this. Btw, it was a demon. TUNE IN NEXT TIME. SAME myUMBC TIME, SAME myUMBC CHANNEL.
(edited about 12 years ago)
